Diim aka: Jim

S: Ready to do your profile?

 J: I guess. You’ve nagged me so often that I’ve run out of excuses to not do one <s>. Do you want it in the usual format? Past, present, future stuff?

S: That wouldn’t really work with you. Profiles are normally only four or five hundred words long. We’d have to serialise your past over about 30 profiles!

J: You’re too kind. Actually I’m much older than that <s>

S: Perhaps you could summarise it briefly …. Very, very, briefly!

J: Okay. I’ll try to keep it short. My first job -

S: Hang on! What about school?

J: That’s what I thought at the time. I played hooky so much that Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn came to me for lessons. I think I done pretty good for someone with no edukashun!

S: <sigh> Well at least that will shorten the Profile

J: I joined the army when a centurion was a rank not a tank -

S: When was that?

J: Ages ago. My army number was 2. Julius Caesar insisted on being allocated 1! My first job was making maps from aerial photos -

S: That must have been interesting!

J: It was okay. Hardest part was the training.

S: ?

J: Have you ever tried teaching a pterodactyl to use a Kodak Instamatic? I did that for about 5 years, then changed to doing admin/pay/pensions/accounts stuff. I’ve been doing that now for more years than I care to remember

S: So what’s your job now?

J: I spend most of my time hiding MindProbes from my boss <s> I’m an office manager, mainly still doing accounts stuff. The company I work for chiefly exports stuff to Europe, so I have to go online to get accurate foreign exchange info.

S: I’ve noticed that! You seem to be online a lot from work! Are exchange rates that crucial?

J: Naah! I spend 5 minutes max getting those, then spend as much time as possible improving my general knowledge by playing trivia games <eg>

S: Uh huh! I can tell from the scores hosts send me whether you’ve had a busy day at work or not <s>

J: I wouldn’t say I can get bored at work, but sometimes I even play Tangler!

S: What do you do in your spare time?

J: Hmm. There’s my hosiery collection to catalogue and maintain. That doesn’t take too much time yet, but the collection is slowly getting larger <s> Mainly I plonk myself down at a puter in one trivia room or another. Guess I’m a trivia junky. I go to MP and another place for the company, humour and friendship. I’ve graduated from just sitting in a trivia room to going to lots of places to meet players. Over the last few years I’ve travelled literally thousands of miles, must have seen more of America than most Americans and met some of the nicest people on this lil old planet! Right now I’m planning to give USA a break from me; its about time the Antipodes got to suffer too!

S: So what about the future?

J: Still working on being called a dag at least once a day! And I’m still worried about the shores

S: What shores?

J: Thanks! I’ll have another Irish coffee, please, Suzy!

 
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